Uncharted land
“Area B, or should I say the Uncharted land, is a land full
of haunted boats,” explained Uncle Chris.
“Okay there,” said Jesse.
“let me tell you a true story then” said Uncle Chris.
“People were seeing boats at spots they aren’t supposed to
be,” said Uncle Chris. “But one night the ocean water was going away and all of
sudden trees were growing.” “So my great grandfather went to the trees and saw every
boat on the land and was hearing spooky noises inside the boats. After that
he knew that the boats were haunted.”
-On " “Area B, or should I say the Uncharted land, is a land full of haunted boats,” said Uncle Chris." you should change said to explained
ReplyDelete-On "“Okay there” said Jesse." you should change it to "Okay then," Jesse said in disbelief
-On " “People were seeing boats at spots they aren’t supposed to be,” I think you should change it to " “People were seeing boats at spots when they weren't there,”
-I think you mean trees not tress
-you put "growing.” “So my great" you don't need quotations marks in between them
-in your first sentence, it says after that he knew, you need a comma after after that
-on "“let me tell you a true story then" you need to capitalize let and you need a period after then
-
nice story but fix this
ReplyDelete- in your second sentence /“Okay there” said Jesse./ you need to change it to /“Okay there,” said Jesse./ so add a comma after /there/
-also in your last paragraph, second sentence you wrote /“But one night the ocean water was going away and all of sudden tress were growing.”/ you should change it to /“But one night the ocean water was going away and all of the sudden trees were growing.”/ so in front of /sudden/ put /the/ and you wrote /tress/ you need to change that to /trees/
- also in your third sentence you wrote /“let me tell you a true story then” said Uncle Chris./ you should change it to /“let me tell you a true story then,” said Uncle Chris./ so again add a comma after the word /there/
- also when you write /great grandfather/ it should be /great-grandfather/
-also in your last sentence, /After that he knew that the boats were haunted/ you need to put a comma after the word that.
overall nice story, also double space, and you wrote /growing.” “So my/ you cannot have double quotations.
also for your tittle change it to /Uncharted Land/ so put a capital /L/ and capital /U/.
OVERALL NICE STORY.